One Month!

Today is one month of marriage for us...although our wedding feels like it was FOREVER ago. I think it's just because we've been packing/moving/adjusting to married life and we've packed a lot into this past month.

Kory texted me yesterday telling me not to make plans for tonight because we're going on a date! I was even more excited this morning when I found out we're going to

I've been craving chips and salsa from there lately so I can't wait to taste that yummy goodness!

I decided to make Kory one of his favorite desserts for tonight, so I attempted Key Lime Pie. Even though I added what seemed like a gallon of lime juice, it somehow wasn't enough and it doesn't really taste very limey. However, the combination of sweetened condensed milk, whipped cream and graham cracker crust still tastes delicious. I guess that just means I'll have to make another one soon so I can try again. No complaints here!

Not my pie...but it sure does make me hungry!

Married

Well here we are at week 3 of being married now. Life is really good! :)

We should be spending our evenings packing our apartment so we can move next week. However, we've been doing more fun things instead. Monday night we got groceries and cooked a really yummy dinner that took a while. Last night we went to see Super 8, which was really really good. I had popcorn, hot tamales and a Coke for dinner. Delicious and ridiculous.

Tonight, I hope we can ride our bikes. I have so much fun on our new bikes, but these stinking Oregon hills are going to kill me.

We're living out of suitcases and boxes right now so that's always interesting. We thought we were moving sooner so a lot of our clothes are already packed away. I wonder if people at my work are noticing I'm wearing the same outfits over and over?

Our plan as of right now is to move to Roseburg to these apartments and start looking into buying a house. Sadly these apartments don't allow pets so we have to figure out what to do with them for a little while. Hopefully some families from church will adopt them short-term. I'll definitely miss playing with them though, so we'll have to visit them often. The great thing about these apartments is that they do month-by-month rent so we don't have to sign a lease.

I would like to think we'll clean the apt and pack tonight, but realistically I know we'll play on the iPad. We're obsessed with crossword puzzles lately. Yes, we are 80 years old.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Change is a great word to describe my life right now. Marriage itself brings a lot of big changes: living together, sharing money, different last name, etc. However, we have quite a few more changes happening in the next couple weeks.

Kory just accepted a new job with a different church. The great part is that the job is in Roseburg, Oregon...which is the city I already work in! That is wonderful news because I can keep my current job AND I don't have to commute anymore. It wasn't terrible-about 25 minutes-but I will be very happy to be able to run home for lunch or to live in a town with a movie theater and Sonic! We are moving to the big city, y'all. From a town of 3,000 to one with 22,000. That is a big deal, mainly because it puts us half an hour closer to Chili's :)

Kory will be the high school youth minister at Redeemer's Fellowship and we are both SO excited about it! I will have to post about the incredible way God brought this opportunity into our lives soon. It is awesome to see how He's been working. The plan is to start that job after the wedding and honeymoon.

So we got Kory's stuff all moved into my apartment yesterday and he is staying with a friend for the month of May to save a month of paying rent. This means we get to move again right when we get back from the honeymoon. We have got a lot of my apt packed up now also so we need to start looking at housing options in Roseburg pretty soon.

Redeemer's is a church of 1,000 people and we currently worship in a church of 130 people...so that will be an adjustment. All of these changes are positive, though, and we're very excited about all of it! It's just sometimes a lot to take all at once.

However, I'm so thankful I don't have to quit my job and look for another one. That makes a huge difference in lowering my stress level. In fact, I really don't feel too stressed out by all of this...I just feel excited and ready for it to all start happening!

The next few weeks are pretty crazy for us. Last Monday night (May 2), we met with the youth ministry volunteers and let them know about this new job and made plans for Kory's transition. Then, Kory was preaching Sunday morning (May 8) and announced it to the church body, so it's officially "out" and we can tell everyone we're moving now. This Wednesday (May 11), we'll talk to the youth group kids about it, so I'm sure that will be kind of hard. We have two more Sundays to attend church at Tri City and then we'll be gone for the wedding. When we return from the honeymoon (June 5), Kory will have one week off and then start his job at Redeemer's and we'll make the move to Roseburg.

We got Kory completely moved out of his apartment because I wanted to come home from the honeymoon to a clean apartment where we were all moved in and settled...silly me. I should have known it wouldn't be that easy! However, God is dumping blessing after blessing on us, so we will not complain. We will just be excited about the changes that are coming our way! :)

Marriage

Obviously I've been thinking about marriage a LOT these days. However, I keep coming back to one frustration with marriage and that is...married couples. Married couples who complain about marriage or joke about the ball and chain or just flat out give the world a negative view on marriage.

For every person who congratulates me and is genuinely excited for me, there is another person who has told me they're sorry or asked if I really want to go through with this or told Kory he's throwing his life away...with me standing right beside him. I get that people are usually joking. The thing is, it's not very funny.

I suppose you never really understand the gravity of a lifetime commitment until you're faced with making that decision. It's big. Like bigger than I ever realized. This is serious business folks. Yes, marriage should be fun and isn't a bore, but when I hear the way married people are talking about marriage, it's no wonder young adults and teens would rather just move in together or avoid marriage at all costs.

Pretty much every comedian talks trash about their marriage. They demean their spouse and make fun of them, while everyone else dies laughing at their expense. This is not just non-Christians we're talking about here. Older married Christian men have warned Kory that he better enjoy this time in his life because he's about to become a modern-day slave to my honey-do list. Is that what we're signing up for?

Now, we have also received many positive comments about marriage and have seen some great couples who still delight in each other. However, I can say that most of those comments come from our friends who have all been married 5 years or less. It would be easy to say, Well of course they're happy, they're still in the honeymoon stage, blah blah blah. I prefer to believe it's because we have a new generation standing up to say my marriage isn't just going to be ok. It's going to be awesome because we're going to work on it and never let it get to a point where we're just married because we're Christians and Christians don't divorce.

Kory and I have set a couple standards for our relationship that we hope will help us and others around us in improving our view of marriage. Number 1, we both committed to always speak positively about marriage. That doesn't mean we won't be realistic and honest that it is hard work and it involves struggles, but we vow to show others that deep commitment brings freedom and love, not burden and obligations. Number 2, we have made a decision that we won't use the D-word in our home. No, not that D-word. We won't say the word "Divorce". I don't just mean we won't ever threaten to divorce each other, but that we won't ever say the word in any context. It's a personal choice that we've made and it's only that. It doesn't mean we think other people shouldn't say it, but we believe for us, it is a topic that is not EVER an option and we don't want to even discuss it in our home. We have noticed that it often becomes commonplace and casual to talk about that subject and we don't want any part of that destruction in our family. I know it might seem extreme to some of you, but we think this is something we are willing to go to extreme lengths to honor and protect our marriage.

I can't end this post without thanking Trey Morgan for his positive example and encouraging words about marriage. I am very grateful for the many ways he promotes healthy marriages and for his example in publicly praising his wife. You don't even have to meet the man for him to be a blessing in your life. Thanks Trey!

Submission

As a highly opinionated and fairly independent gal growing up, I was always fiercely opposed to the idea of a wife submitting to her husband. I hated the idea that the man was in charge and the wife, by sheer virtue of being female, was supposed to do exactly as he said.

Obviously, that's not exactly how God designed marriage, but that is how I interpreted it, and if I'm being honest, that is how I saw a lot of Christian marriages being played out. I saw wives who had to ask their husbands permission far more than I liked and I saw husbands who decided just how often the wife was allowed to leave the home.

The other day I was listening to a podcast on marriage and the speaker said something about the man being the head of the household. His take on it was that God doesn't say he "should" be the head of the household, he says he IS. Scientists don't sit around discussing if water SHOULD be wet. It just is and they accept it and make all their other decisions and calculations around that fact.

Next he talked about how God is really the Head of the household (Big H) and that means He's the big man in charge. The man is the head of the household (little H) which means he is just held to a higher responsibility regarding the lives/souls of his wife and kids (eww...responsibility? Who wants that? No thanks! I'll gladly give that to the man!)

My final thought on the matter was actually really sweet. I realized that I don't mind submitting to Kory. I trust him and don't worry that he'll take advantage of my vulnerability or boss me around or make me do things his way in the name the position God has given him. I actually love knowing that I can submit to a man who I love and trust fully and completely. I WANT to serve him and do what's best for him. I know he'll do the same for me and I don't have to worry about my needs being met because we're mutually looking out for and taking care of each other.

Maybe God knew what he was talking about after all? How about that!

Marriage

Quote from a lady I work with: "I will never be married again. It's way too much sacrifice and not near enough in return."

Then she tried to convince me marriage isn't worth the hassle. What a sad view of marriage.

She also told me she doesn't know anyone who is happily married--they are all trapped and just don't have the guts or money to get out of the marriage, in her opinion.

Wedding Fun

I spent last weekend in Midland for Michael and Danielle's wedding! It was such a fun weekend and they had an awesome wedding! They know how to throw quite a party :) Love my rub so much!

All the bridesmaids in our awesome dresses! These are maybe my fav dresses for a wedding ever! (unless I was in your wedding and you are reading this, then yours were my favorite :)

Beautiful bride!!

I don't miss West Texas for this reason...ugh. So brown and ugly. This was what I saw as I looked out the plane window leaving Midland.

I spent the whole plane ride being sad about living so far away from friends and then I saw this outside my window in Portland and I remembered why I love living here!